He’s Not Your ‘Type,’ He’s Your Trauma

You tell yourself he’s your type.

You’re drawn to the broken bad boy. The emotionally unavailable entrepreneur. The hot-and-cold guy who gives you just enough to stay hooked but never enough to feel secure.

There’s chemistry. Butterflies. An electric pull that feels like fate.

But here’s the truth you need to hear.

He’s not your type—he’s your trauma.

Why You Keep Attracting the Same Man with a Different Face

If you’re a successful, self-aware, deeply loving woman who somehow keeps ending up in situationships or one sided relationships—this isn’t about your worth. It’s about your wiring.

Your nervous system is subconsciously scanning for familiarity—not safety.

So if “love” has always felt like inconsistency, walking on eggshells, emotional distance, or chasing approval in childhood or past relationships…

Then emotional unavailability feels like home.

And even though that chaos feels exciting—it’s not necessarily just chemistry. It’s your trauma bonding.

It’s your body saying,
“This feels like what I’ve always known. Let’s go recreate it… maybe this time he’ll stay, choose me and I’ll finally feel worthy.”

When Attraction Is Really a Trauma Response

You don’t consciously choose to chase the man who won’t commit.

You don’t want the guy who takes three days to text back, flirts but won’t make plans, or leaves you feeling confused.

But part of you is addicted to the emotional rollercoaster—because it matches what love felt like in the past.

The high of getting his attention after feeling ignored?
That rush isn’t love.
That’s cortisol. That’s dopamine.
Your body is feeling and repeating the same story:
“If I work harder, maybe I’ll finally be enough to be chosen.”

“But I Can’t Help Who I’m Attracted To…”

This is where so many women stay in the same pattern.

They say things like:

• “The nice guy is boring and too short.”

• “I need to be the one there for him—he needs me”

• “But I don’t have this type of connection with anyone else.”

But the truth is—you’ve associated the push-pull cycle with passion.

You’ve mistaken emotional safety for boredom… because your system has never felt safe and stable in love before.

Until you rewire your attachment patterns and create true safety in your body, you’ll keep choosing the familiar over the fulfilling.

And that’s exactly why I created Upgrade Your Love Blueprint™.

The Real Reason You’re Still Single (And It’s Not What You Think)

You’ve done therapy.
You’ve read the books.
You’ve tried to detach.

But your love life still feels like:

• Chasing men who won’t commit

• Settling for breadcrumbs

• Anxiously spiraling every time a guy pulls away

• Feeling like you’re “too much” or “not enough”

This isn’t because you’re broken.
It’s because your love blueprint is still wired for unstable connection.

And no amount of mindset work can override a dysregulated nervous system.

What you need isn’t another tip or trick.
You need a full-body upgrade in how you relate to love and safety.

Imagine This…

You walk into a date and feel grounded—not anxious.
You know you’re worthy of love without over-functioning to earn it.
You feel attracted to emotionally available men instead of the ones who trigger your wounds.
You’re able to trust yourself—and him.
You feel chosen, safe, and adored.

That’s not a fantasy. That’s the result of doing the real work to rewire the way you experience love from the inside-out.

Your “Type” Will Change When You Heal

When you heal, what you’re attracted to changes.

You stop craving the unavailable man.
You stop needing to prove your worth.
You stop confusing chaos for chemistry.

And you start choosing love that feels safe, reciprocal, steady—and still sexy.

Because secure doesn’t mean boring.
It means no more guessing, spiraling, or chasing.
It means you get to relax, receive, and be deeply loved.

Ready to Break the Pattern?

You’re not crazy, broken, or asking for too much.
You’ve just been stuck in a loop that isn’t yours to carry anymore.

Inside Upgrade Your Love Blueprint™, I help women like you stop chasing the wrong men and start attracting secure, emotionally available love—by healing the patterns keeping you in fear versus safety.

We go deep—into your nervous system, subconscious beliefs, and attachment wiring—so you can finally embody the secure woman who attracts everything she wants in love.

He’s not your type. He’s your trauma.
So now it’s time to choose differently. Click here to get started.